Thursday, January 27, 2011

Just an update!

Yes! I am able to find the piano room again this afternoon. Remember I said about the door that can't be open? It can today. I am so happy..or I would be wasting my time and money. Worse is, I couldn't touch the piano..haha..

Been inside the room for almost 2hours +.

The down side of this is, I am now very itching to go to that room again. Too bad, tomorrow is Friday, which means I have a full day class from 9am to 5pm. Sad case.. Sat and sun no open...

So now I have to bear with it until next week. Thinking of going there on Monday.. haha

btw.. I just remember that I don't have metronome with me and stupid me had just simply chosen a tuner without a metronome when I bought my ukulele that time.. I just realised few days ago.. =.="

So, clever me go search for iphone apps. And lucky me, found many many free metronome to download. Which I did. And it works very well. Loud enough and the range is big. Haha.. Good good!


Now, I need to continue to work on my PDS.. whatever it is.. T_T

ps. played Windmill (風車) sang by 佘詩曼 in 宮心計 ..  very sweet song.. so miss it now..haha

Monday, January 24, 2011

+ Picture - words

When browsing through my blog, I noticed that I had written lots of words recently. Where has all the photos go????? Hmm.. I think it is time to post some pix. Let's see...

Some random photos ahead~

Taken at Chrismas when the sky is so beautiful 

My handmade pen holder - from toilet roll.. ^^ 

1st turtl-neck shirt from ZARA - £9.99 (I wouldn't buy in Malaysia)

Cubee Craft craze..

Fruits I love

Cherries..1st time eat fresh cherry! XD


And oranges..good! 

Oh.. this bottle was being thrown in the park. Stupid drunker.. Anyway, when I'm trying to take an angle to snap this bottle, a crouch down on the ground and my camera nearly touching the grass. And a old man walk by and saw me in this weird position. He ask me whether there's anything interesting in the grass. He thought I saw some rare insect or plant or whatever-he-expected. When I told him it is that bottle far away, he laugh. =,=" 

For more photos, take a look at here

Saturday, January 22, 2011


It is already half way through the 1st month of twenty-eleven. And what have I done?

It is time to give myself a short review and decide which part should I work more.

1. Had a big mouth that don't think before speaking.

I hate myself at times. The worst thing is, I hate myself after I speak. Very often, I will speak aimlessly, or without thinking that what I said might have hurt someone, or give a bad impression of me. After speaking, and laughing it off, I would head back home and then it dawn on me that I might have said something wrong. I would start to think, maybe I should not said that. Or, I would keep thinking of I should have said 'that' instead of 'this'. Recently, it really became worse. I started to feel a lot more and more insecurity. I started to not believing my fast judgement and I am afraid I might have make some bad impression. If I have notice this while speaking, I could have control myself, but I did not. I only think after the incident and this is damn stupid.

2. Watching a lot of drama everyday. More than half the day spent infront of the laptop.

It is really bad for the eyes. And it is also very bad for my mentality. I am afraid I would sooner or later fall into the deep pit of TVB without me realising and when I want to crawl out, it will be too late. Who can help me then? Since arriving at Nottingham to study, I had been relying on TVB for cheering me up and entertaining me. I watch when I am bored, happy, sad, worry, emo, stress, sleepy, hungry, full. In short, all my free time inside the room. How can I do that? I think I really should control myself a little. At least, cut down half of it. I hope I would not get depressed and forget about controlling and keep going on. *ush!*

3. Starting to write the dissertation but realised I forgot how to write.

The term had begun for the 2nd week now and I had to start my dissertation. I don't dislike writing but I noticed, I can't write. I am just lost for what in the world I had to write. It seems too broad and what should I do? And then, the bomb fall on me on Friday. We had to do a Product Specification. What the hell is that all about? The lecturer then went on to talk about the engineering process, the graph, and blah blah blah. And we are all suppose to produce THOSE! He said that although we are not engineering but it is a process that we should all follow. My friends, you know me. I am an idiot in science. All because of the science subject, I can't get straight As in both my UPSR and PMR. BOTH!!!! And now, I am required to work the scientific ways and with all those formulas and numbers and decision. It is getting my nerves now. I did not realised that a designer should deal with these science. I choose design because it is arts and because it is free. I do not have to follow any formula because it is arts. But then, he tell me that a designer SHOULD follow a formula and blah blah blah. What am I to do now? I have zero knowledge in this field. You would have said, good then. You learn more things. (Well, this is what I tell my other friend previously as something similar happened to her earlier) But, the problem is, I don't understand why is these process important. I am so sorry if that question make me more idiotic. He said that in an artistic sense, it is right to do what you want but he's afraid that that is not the way to get an academic approval. WTH! He said that in order for us to pass this MA, the panel are looking at our formulas and process and it need to be done. I still think that it is stupid. I have tried reading the books about this subject and I'm sorry to say that not one word had entered my mind. I totally do not understand what in the world is the Pugh guy talking about. It is totally alien language. Maybe I should just get into a rocket and fly myself to the Mars and ask the Martian to teach me alien language. It should be a lot easier.

4. I have eaten a lots for the pass few months and I have not sweat. Therefore, a gym it is.

Yes. I have finally decided to join the gym nearby. It has a swimming pool, although come to think of it I am not sure whether I would go swimming everytime I go there. The job of washing and drying my swimsuit is just too much for me. However, I love the equipment there as it makes me sweat. And the classes are great as well. I just hope I can keep going for the 6 months as I have sign the membership for 6 months. At least, I want to be slim when I'm back.

5. Not travelling at all.

I can foresee that it is going to be a lot more crazy in the coming months. But I have not forgotten my idea to travel. No matter how busy it is, I am sure the weekend would be good enough for me to travel to some place nearby. Weekend is a 100% sure that I would not do any work at all. It would be wasting my precious time in the UK by hiding myself inside the room and watching my laptop whole day. It would be an idiotic act. Planning my escaped now. I hope I have some great photos for you guys soon. I had not really explore any new angle in taking photos previously in London as we seem to be in a rush everytime we reach a spot. So,  just a snap-and-go-attitude. However, I would really like to spent sometime, exploring my surrounding, taking photos until I am satisfied. Stay tuned!

ps. I had a great chat with my dear friend since childhood, about her coming to the UK to travel with me end of the year. SC! Make sure you put more effort persuading your daddy. Haha.. You don't want to disappoint me right?!

Oh, and the way we think of how to persuade her parents to sponsor her to the UK, it make me think back how we used to discuss ways to persuade our parents to let us go and play at each other house, to sleepover together or to some nearby shopping complex. Those days, we use the phone and we can talk at the phone for hours until my mom will scold. Thinking back, those days are really funny. We can plot a lot of reason to tell mom to allow me to go over to her house to play, when her house is just behind my house. See? How much had we now grown? We don't talk so much on the phone anymore. Partly because the phone is expansive (my dad use to scold me for talking so long thus making him paying a high phone bill) and because we all now know how to use the internet. Time really flies. Now we are plotting to persuade her parents to allow her to visit me as well, but over country. No over house. And we use the MSN to discuss, not the phone anymore.

It's really kind of sad actually. Since talking throught the internet or sms is really not human-touch enough. We might get 'long-distance' if we are not careful. Luckily, both of us are really idiot. We click each time we met, which is almost once per year.. LoL..

Hey SC! Don't forget your mission ya. Behave well these days and helps daddy more.. Be a good girl.. Haha..


Thursday, January 20, 2011

My English

Writing is the best way to release stress. No, I am not kidding. According to some research done, (I'm not going into these boring bits) creative writing does help to reduce stress. When you are feeling very tight in mood, feeling angry or feeling sad, and there is no one to talk to, try writing. It is not necessarily to be grammatically correct nor must it sounds like Shakespeare. Just write down your current emotion or anything that pops up in your mind. For example, if you are angry, take a piece of paper, or rather, open up Microsoft Word and start typing. Write down why do you feel so angry. Note down the details. How it happened, who is the one that caused the argument, why did it happened, what do you plan to do.. And all the others things that you want. Then, either save it or delete it. Some might say delete. By pressing delete, it will be like throwing all your bad mood away, to the dark hole wherever it is. Save it and you will remind yourself why that happened and how to avoid it next time. It is entirely up to individual. However, I am sure after writing about it, you will slowly forget about it. If it still sting, continue writing. Slowly, you will calm down and see the positive side. 

I am sure no one hates writing. Some might hate it because they doesn't want to write in English. If they were allowed to write in the language they love and confident, then, everyone will write. This, I noticed in my friends who were highly educated in the Chinese language. Me? I can't write in Chinese. (pity me~) When they are required to write in English, they groan and struggle. But it is not because they hate writing, it is the language. Try asking them to write in Chinese, they will complete it before you can say MaMaMia! 

Language is always a barrier. I always think so. I did not received any Chinese language education so I am a banana. (You know, I know what is a banana, if you don't, google B-A-N-A-N-A) The only language I can write in is English and Malay. I don't use Malay very often and since I graduated from high school, I don't remember writing any Malay sentences.. (My bad) All I write in is only English. People tell me that my English is good, but ask any of the experts in English and they will tell you I am only an amateur. It is only I write proper English sentences because that is the only language I can use to communicate when writing and reading. How else would I write and read? I read English fictions. I write blogs in English. I speak English when people speak Mandarin. This had happened ever since I learn the ABC. Sometimes, I will think, if I don't have English with me, I have nothing. Unlike some of my friends, without English, they have their Chinese. Me. Without English, I will never survived. However, my English isn't that good as you think it is. I cannot differentiate between verb, noun, or adverb. All I know is Adjectives. Weird? 


That is because I did not learn the English the way some people learned it. I don't learn it by learning noun and verb. Or add 'something' behind the noun or whatever it is. I don't have the formula to write sentences. I learn the English by reading since I am 5. I read Tom and Kate. Words by words. Few years later, I read famous five, Malory Towers, etc. Few more years, I read Jane Eyre, Pride and Prejudice, Sherlock Holmes. I never bother about the grammars rules because they never bother me. I know how to form sentences and get the grammar right. I might sound arrogant here. But all I'm trying to say is, I know that the grammar is right because it sounded right to be. But a good teacher will tell you, it sounded right because of the-don't-know-what-noun-or-verb-follow-by-adverb-and-blah-blah-blah. I can never tell you that. 

I have langugage support class here in NTU which all International Students are require to attend. I find that these classes are interesting partly because I don't need to rack my brain to answer questions. It flows smoothly. Until.. the faithful day~

It was Wednesday as usual. Class starts at 11am. I walk into the class and sit down and start chatting with another girl happily. And then, our lecturer comes in and we all settle down. She pass out the papers as usual and I start to go =.="

We are given a Noun or a Verb and then we need to fill in the adverb and adjective, and vice versa. This is a problem I can't solve. First of all, what is an adverb? 

These words are all very familiar to me and I use it everyday. However, to classified them into different categories, is a hell for me. I can't bring them back to their respective home. I'm so sorry dear Words..

I am sorry but I may sound very arrogant in this post to some people. And I might also not get my sentences 'grammatically' correct at all. So, if you have a problem, ignore this post. Because it is my right to express myself anyway I like. 

Thank You. 

Wednesday, January 19, 2011

Something's wrong..terribly wrong

I just realised. 

Of all the time in my 24 hours life per day, the time I enjoy most and the happiest and most relax is........

When I am eating.


Yes yes, I know it is not good for my diet. But today, after class and I walked home, I feel greatly depressed. I'm not sure what caused my mood swing but I just doesn't want to do anything. I don't feel like talking to anyone nor reading nor shopping. And when a girl doesn't want to shop, you know something is wrong.

I reach my room and throw my bag on the bed and slump myself on the chair right infront of the laptop. Surf some Facebook as usual, check mails and try to catch up on some dramas.

However, I still feel.. very very very very bad mood. I feel like crying all of a sudden without any valid reason. But too bad, those stupid tears doesn't want to come out.

I can't seem to settle down. I don't want to go out but I don't want to stay inside as well. I know I ought to work at my dissertation or even some sketches, but I don't want to think about them at all at that moment. I am not very sure what I want to do actually.

Finally, I decided it is time to get some food since I haven't had lunch. Dump some nuggets and fries into the oven and back to my drama until they are ready.

When I bring back my food into my room and settle down to eat, I finally feel relax and I cheer up a little. It was then I realised that by eating, I will be happy. I can forget anything while eating. I can drown my sorrows while eating. That's why I don't success in all my slimming plan.

That is why I always said, even if I am dead tired or very busy or in rush, I will still stop to eat. Because I love eating. And now I realised, I will be happy if I eat.

I know that it is bad to drown myself by eating. But I can't help it. While I am here without anyone to talk deep talk, without anyone to listen to me, without anyone to cheer me up, all I can do is cheer up myself. And I only can do that by eating.

So dear fellow friends, if the next time you see me and I've gained twice my size, don't shout it at my face ok?

Tuesday, January 18, 2011

Piano room or no?

It's very random. I just feel like writing something. BUT! I don't know what. T_T

I suddenly wanted to play piano a lot. I'm not sure why. When I have my piano with me, I don't seem to find it so.. attractive. I mean, of course I love my piano. What's not to love about it?

BRAND NEW PETROF upright.. dark brown in colour with a little hint of reddish.. glossy finish.

Touch is SUPER nice.. with GREAT sounds..

Omg.. now that I mentioned it, I do miss it.. T_T

Right, back to where I left. I just realised that ever since I learn the piano, I had not been away from my piano for more than 1 week. Even during my Year 3 where I have those stupid deadlines to rush when I stay awake rendering and cutting model boards for 2 night straight.. I still find the time to touch my piano, in order to stay awake and release tension. Now.. I can't even find a good place for me to play the piano. And it has already going into the fourth month..

I found 1 piano on the corridor of Bonington but, CORRIDOR! Everyone walks by and my lousy playing can be heard everywhere! Imagine the horror of it. I tried playing there a few times but I can't relax. Furthermore, the free time I have to play always seem to clashed with another guy. Who always get there before me. He plays SUPERBLY!!!!!! I heard him play the Bach prelude and fugue.. fingers flying like hell. And then he played Chopin. Notes follow notes. It's one of the pieces which I TRIED playing before and haven't succeed. Damn no good to play at that place. Where everyone had been accustom to hearing the finest music. How can I hurt their ears by mine?

Then, I went to Clifton. To go there, I need to take the bus. Paid £3.20 for a return trip. Imagine..That amount just to play on the piano. Alright, don't get started on the money thingy. Anyway, today is my first time to Clifton campus and I sort of.. get lost inside the campus. I reach the main building, which is the George Elliot building and ask the reception there for the piano rooms. He told me to wait for 5 mins. I wait. 15mins passed. Then this guy, grab his bag and coat and walk out of the door. I stared at him. He saw me and say, "I'm going back now, but my relief will be here in a minute. He'll take you there." @_@

So I continue to wait. I have to be back to the City campus by 4pm as I have another class at 5pm, and it's already 2pm. How long can I play on the piano if I continue to wait like this? And don't forget about the bus fare. ^^" Another 15mins passed and finally the relief came. And he take me through a  passage and reach the doors. He tried to open it, failed. Tried another. To no avail. Then, he proceeded to take me through ANOTHER long passage.. it's a bit like a dungeon to me because it is dark (I'm not sure why the lights are not all on..) and there's no one and no sound all through the corridors. The doors are old and closed. I guess no one ever ask him for the piano rooms because he seems lost as well. =.="

Finally, he used his walkie-talkie and ask his colleague where in the world is this piano rooms and his colleague guide him correctly. Finally, we are there. But it's damn eerie I tell you. Lighting is dim and no one's there. The piano is quite old and the room is bare.. He then leave me there, but not before I ask him how in the world am I suppose to get out from there..=.="""

Luckily there's just an emergency exit at the end of the corridor not far from the room. That's the door he's trying to open earlier but fail.. haha.. So that means I only can exit. What about another time? When I want to get back to this room? I don't think I remember how to get to this room after all the routes he take me through.. T_T

So I open the piano and start playing. But not before knocking on the wall to see whether it is board or brick. It's brick. So that's better. Haha..

Finally, I settle down and practice my pieces for about an hour +. After that, I thought I would like to explore the passages and see which way I came from. I tried to go through a door.. and that leads to another empty passage with doors.. without anyone. I started to feel more eerie, I decided to just leave this place. Haha..

I'm not sure I dare to go to this place again though.. but the idea of having a room with piano to myself is very tempting..hehe

So, what should I do the next time I want to play again? Which place should I opt for? Vote for me please..


Saturday, January 15, 2011

Short review of A Place of Secrets by Rachel Hore

A Place of Secrets

Recently, I was browsing for books to read (I mean fictions) at and since I do not have any idea what types of fiction I am looking for, I just browse randomly. There's such a wide variety of choices to choose from and the downside of this whole thing is, I couldn't 'really' browse the inside of the books, if you get what I mean. So, all I can do is to rely on the cover page, title of the book, author and the synopsis at the back of the book.

As I came to this book, A Place of Secrets by Rachel Hore, I was immediately attracted to the title. After all, secrect are always interesting aren't they? So I click on it and read more about the book cover. And decided to buy instantly. I know I will not regret.

And I did not. I'm still reading the book at the time I'm writing this but I thought such a lovely book should be shared among my friends. I wouldn't do any spoiler here but just so random excerpt from the book to see whether would it capture you interest.

"A flash of childhood memory. Where are you, Maman? I can't see you. Waking up in a small London bedroom, streetlight shining through pale curtains and an insect buzzing away at the inside of the window."

"Sleep didn't come. She lay puzzling for a while over the story Gran had told her, about the gypsy girl in the forest at Starbrough. There was a folly. They'd played near the folly, she'd said. She'd have to look for that tomorrow."

"Returning to Starbrough Hall, she spent quite a few hours in the library there, cataloguing, then started in earnest the cumbersome job of transcribing Esther's memoir. The section she'd already read was an easy job, but when she came to the next part it took longer, not least because she kept stopping to think about the story evolving beneath her hand. Esther's voice, timid and formal at first, was growing in strength and confidence as she proceeded."

"At this, Jude practically lost her power of speech. Esther had written about the gypsy's scarf and it was poppy red. An obvious choice of colour perhaps, but it was Summer's certainly that was bothering Jude, and the fact that so many coincidences were stacking up."

There.. does it peak your interest? I hope I'm not giving away too much spoiler. Haha.. But I'm sure your mind must be turning since these excerpts come randomly inside the book and it doesn't give you an idea what to read.

I'll just explain a little then.

The main character, Jude is a auctioneer which had a terrible experience. She lost her husband to a mountain-climbing accident and she is struggling with life without him. As time pass, Jude began to continue with her career but when the job to value a collection of Wickham's collection, a 18th-century astronomer, stories begun to unfold lots of stories. Why did her childhood nightmare return now? How did her niece, Summer, had the similar nightmares? What had the past got to do with the present? Does it relates to the Starbrough folly?

There's a lot of questions to answer and you can only get it through the book. Jude is finding the answers with the help from Euan, local naturalist. Do you want to be part of it?

Go grab the book now! 

Saturday, January 8, 2011

A Different Birthday Style

Today is January 8th, 2011. My Birthday. ^^

The usual celebration will include me and my close friends having a small dinner or lunch together. This time however, I'm without their presence, with me alone in the UK. But! I know I have a bunch of great friends when I received their presents through mail on the 7th. ^^

FedEx mail

Instead of the usual celebration and cake, they sent me a card, a cake card to be exact, and a video. The video contains compilation of photos that we haven't taken together over the years and their personal messages to me. I was so touched. These are my best friends. Whom I really appreciate and feel glad to have known them. It really warms my heart and put a smile on my face, plastered whole day, till now. ^^

The card + Cake 

The heart-shape necklace

Oh, and besides the usual celebration with friends, I would also have a simple but happy dinner with my family. So, this year, they couldn't possibly sent any dinner to me but they have bought me presents to make me happy. ^^ It's all at home waiting for me.. It make me feel remembered and not left out. ^^

This year, according to SiawCheng, I should enjoy it the UK-style, which I wonder how it is. Haha.. Anyway, I spent the day with Fiola (a friend from Hong Kong), and we went to see the Windmill at Nottingham. It's our first time there and we are so lucky! Today skies are SO blue and with a BRIGHT sun shinning at us. Making our photos so perfect. However, the worst part is the wind. It is so damn windy today that my hair goes hocus pocus... =.="

The view in-front of the Windmill

It's my 1st time seeing a REAL and WORKING windmill and I'm so excited. The sounds that the machines inside make...*crackk*  *crickk*.. XD  very got 'the' feel one.. LOL..

The windmill 

Very bright and sunny and 'blue-sky' day..oh..and very very windy

Fiola & Me

The man who worked inside the windmill 

There's a man working up there (the same man in the previous photo) 

The windmill 

And the view. The view from up the windmill is so beautiful, maybe because today is a nice day with blue sky and sunlight. I really enjoy the view very much. Can almost see the whole of Nottingham and all the houses are so.. cute.. ^^

All the 'small' roof.. ^^

It's quite near to my place, only about 15mins walk, so I think I will go there again if I feel like it. It's really a beautiful place to be. There's a small park next to it. So peaceful and serene.

Nice park?

Btw, the windmill entry is FOC. ^^

Oh.. and here's some of the instant photos that my friend took with her instant camera.. so cool.. I want one as well.. anyone want to get it for me as a birthday gift? haha..^^

Instant photo

All - in - All.. I really have a memorable birthday this year. Although I miss my family and friends a lot today, but I'm not alone today. You all are with me. Thank you for giving me such a wonderful birthday!


Wednesday, January 5, 2011

Day 5 of 2011

It's already the 5th day into 2011 and I still haven't done anything to shout about.. Wondering how fast time had pass..(I'm always complaining time pass fast right?  =.="). Anyway, recently, I had a craze..and I really meant it, a sudden craze to snap photos. It's not a problem right? I have my DSLR and I can just go and grab it and *click* *snap* done!

But, the big problem is, I'm not inspired by any subject, or object, literally. I went with my camera all over the Market Square, to the Victoria Centre (nearby shopping centre and my spending hell literally..), to just any roads, but I can't seem to snap any picture that I like. It seems to me, so, normal. Therefore, I bought some photography magazines and read them and look at those photos taken and it seems so beautiful to me. Maybe I just need to take the 'normal' scene from another point of view? I'm not sure. Suddenly I feel quite lost and I just hold my DSLR without knowing what to do with it. I just want to take photos but each of them became similar after sometime. I started to feel discourage.

I thought I would go to the nearby park to snap some grass picture and sky picture, but, luck isn't with me. When I wake up this morning and pull apart my curtain, I saw raindrops. T_T


There goes my mood for the day.

Later in the evening, I take my DSLR to the kitchen and put it on the tripod and try to snap some photos of a grape and an orange. But I guess today just isn't the day to play photography. Those photos either turn out too bright or too dark, or too blur or just couldn't get what I want.

Maybe I should just creep back inside my bed on a day like this instead of fumbling here and there.


Goodnight friends.. Early night in today..

ps. Maybe some yoga before creeping into the warm blanket? hmm..~~

Saturday, January 1, 2011

Reading List

~New reading list~

1-1-11 at 1.11am

All 1

It's already January 2011. Time really flies. Can't believe 1 year had gone again and this time I'm going through it alone in UK. Unbelievable. 

Anyway, this is my wishes for the new year.

1. Be Happy Everyone
2. Be Healthy Everyone
3. Be Safe Everyone
4. Be Wealthy Everyone
5. Be Good Everyone


It's a post at 1-1-11 @ 1.11am