I just want to get away from all this for a while
I want to be free of all this
I want an escape
I want to just forget about all of it
I want to be selfish, extremely selfish
I want to be able to just quit
I want to gain back myself
I just want to be myself
Is that really hard I wonder
Just be truthful to yourself, I told myself
But reality sucks
I can never really be truthful as the truth always hurt people.
No
Not me.
People beside me.
People who care about me.
People who loves me.
People who needs me.
People who just know me.
People who understand me.
People who did not understand me.
I wanted to just escape.
I would be leaving many things behind.
But I would be free.
But I couldn't do that.
Maybe not now.
I could not.
Mentally or physically.
I could not be ready.
I should not be ready.
I want to cry.
But I found I can no longer cry.
No longer be able to cry when I am sad.
No longer be able to cry when I feel I want to cry.
But
When I am crying inside,
Who knows
Who understand
Why bother?
It's me
I know
It's me
I cannot just run away from all this
I could not just leave everything
I could not be so unresponsible
I am selfish
I want to be selfish
Maybe I really am SELFISH
Wednesday, February 24, 2010
Tuesday, February 23, 2010
Advice needed.. Frens needed.. Fun needed...
I found that these days, I enjoy writing entries during odd times. Okay, maybe it doesn't sound odd to you but to me it is.
Now is 10.28am, Tuesday, 23rd February 2010. And if you want to know, it is the 10th day of CNY.
Okay, crap aside.
It's my working hours. Siting at my place inside the office. Facing the computer and suddenly the urge to blog came rushing to me. Weird. And I always react to my instinct. hoho..
Btw, I'm starting to get really chubby. And it is time for me to to X-ercise..
Recently, look up Fitness First and True Fitness.. and I am more interested in True Fitness since it have Yoga classes which I admit, my main reason for joining a gym. lol
Anyway, any idea which of the above club is great? With good facilities, good customer service, good environment, (who am I kidding? You want this kind of gym, it will be name heaven.)
So, guys.. give me some advice will you? And anyone interested to go join together? haha.. doing excersise is beset done with frens around.. so you can work out and hang out together.. not to say wash out.. with lost of strength of coz..
imagine running on treadmill while laughing at the silliest jokes.. bet you pengsan immediately.. ~.~"
Now is 10.28am, Tuesday, 23rd February 2010. And if you want to know, it is the 10th day of CNY.
Okay, crap aside.
It's my working hours. Siting at my place inside the office. Facing the computer and suddenly the urge to blog came rushing to me. Weird. And I always react to my instinct. hoho..
Btw, I'm starting to get really chubby. And it is time for me to to X-ercise..
Recently, look up Fitness First and True Fitness.. and I am more interested in True Fitness since it have Yoga classes which I admit, my main reason for joining a gym. lol
Anyway, any idea which of the above club is great? With good facilities, good customer service, good environment, (who am I kidding? You want this kind of gym, it will be name heaven.)
So, guys.. give me some advice will you? And anyone interested to go join together? haha.. doing excersise is beset done with frens around.. so you can work out and hang out together.. not to say wash out.. with lost of strength of coz..
imagine running on treadmill while laughing at the silliest jokes.. bet you pengsan immediately.. ~.~"
Thursday, February 11, 2010
Blank but Full
I have stop being the addict for blogging for quite a while now.. I simply feel too lazy to edit photos and upload them and writes about them. It's enough to make me feel sleepy. I would much rather be spending time in Facebook. Even my Facebook is not that active anymore. Back in my college years, I would be found stalking on everyone I know and updating my status everyday while uploading all pictures that I took and comment on everything.
Now?
Well, life's been so hectic it seems stupid to be surfing the Facebook while I can enjoy myself with my family eventhough it is just a simple supper time talk or a longer shopping+dinner time hours. If time does not allow, I will just brush of the computer and ignore all sort of electronic devices, and pull my blanket up to my neck.
Time is not really enough for me since I started working.
Looking back, I doesn't seem to have a really peaceful moment from the seconds I step foot into KLIA back from my HongKong-GuangZhou trip back in Nov.
I reach my home early Saturday morning/midnight (1am) and sleep oni few hours before dragging my tired and blur self out of my bed to a respectable clothing to TEACH!
Yup!
Few hours back from my holidays, I went straight to Symphonia Child Development to teach piano.
That's my 1st attempt at teaching!
That's my 1st attempt at working!
Needless to say, I manage to scrap through it since I am still teaching now. In fact, few hours after I finish this post.
After that, is a short Sunday for me as I need to get ready to start my 1st official job as a designer at a interior firm.
Why start so soon after my travels?
Well,
It's not my choice. I needed a job and was offer a job and it is not my position to be chosey of the time to start work. I went for an interview a week before I flew to HongKong. And signed the employment letter the next day after the interview. Which means I only left with a few days to prepare my attire to work. Which means, I will be wearing jeans and shirt. Which I still do till this day.
I have already work for 3 months. Teach for 3 months.
So fast.
Besides that, d'Gurlz is also proud to say that the bazaar at Subang Parade is quite successful eventhough the sales is not HOT! But all of us really enjoy time spends that weekend. Been a bit busy since back from the bazaar therefore, photos will be uploaded VERY soon! ^.^
oops..
What am I suppose to be ranting about actually? Let me recap.. =.="
OH!
I actually wanted to say that, I have long since become an addicted-blogger because of time. However, I still check out other people blog. It's only my own blog that I'm lazy. Lol...
Anyway, now, right at this moment, I am inspire to write something. (maybe it is due to the boring-ness at office.. since it is the last day before everyone of us flew for CNY holidays, there's really ntg to do.. not that I have things to do normally.. but today time seems to pass REALLY slow..~.~")
So, like I was saying before I sidetrack again.. I am inspire to write a post. Thus I click open blogger and start a new post. Like usual, I click my mouse to the Title bar and intend to name the blog before I write. I stop. I think.
and think
and think
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
and what title did I get?
None..
Nowadays, when I started writing a post, I absolutely have no idea what to write as title. This is because I am not talking about a specific topic. It's more a simple, no logic, no common sense, no law, no creativity, no pix, no links, no events, no nothing post. I just feel like ranting out a piece of my mind so it doesn't get heavier and I get to memorise other things.
Therefore
teach me! What should I put for the title?
This post is already coming to an end but the Title bar is still empty.. ~o~
how?????
I've finally decided.
And you should already know without me repeating. Since that will be the 1st words you would read before reaching here.
Really crap
Really all bullshit!
Alright.. back to staring to computer.. waiting for 6.30pm..ciao!
OH!
I nearly forgot!
HAPPY CHINESE NEW YEAR GALS & GUYS, AUNTIES & UNCLES, POPO & GONGONG, MADAM & SIRS, PUPPIES & KITTIES..!!!!
btw.. speaking of puppies.. I got so sad. My Lucky receive a pink envelope last week.
A CNY card! From See Veterinary!
See?!
My dog got a card! And I don't!!!
How jealous can I get?!
Do I need to act cute like him in order for me to secure a card?
ceh!
Luckily he decided he will share the card with me!
That's why I love him so much!
^.^
Now?
Well, life's been so hectic it seems stupid to be surfing the Facebook while I can enjoy myself with my family eventhough it is just a simple supper time talk or a longer shopping+dinner time hours. If time does not allow, I will just brush of the computer and ignore all sort of electronic devices, and pull my blanket up to my neck.
Time is not really enough for me since I started working.
Looking back, I doesn't seem to have a really peaceful moment from the seconds I step foot into KLIA back from my HongKong-GuangZhou trip back in Nov.
I reach my home early Saturday morning/midnight (1am) and sleep oni few hours before dragging my tired and blur self out of my bed to a respectable clothing to TEACH!
Yup!
Few hours back from my holidays, I went straight to Symphonia Child Development to teach piano.
That's my 1st attempt at teaching!
That's my 1st attempt at working!
Needless to say, I manage to scrap through it since I am still teaching now. In fact, few hours after I finish this post.
After that, is a short Sunday for me as I need to get ready to start my 1st official job as a designer at a interior firm.
Why start so soon after my travels?
Well,
It's not my choice. I needed a job and was offer a job and it is not my position to be chosey of the time to start work. I went for an interview a week before I flew to HongKong. And signed the employment letter the next day after the interview. Which means I only left with a few days to prepare my attire to work. Which means, I will be wearing jeans and shirt. Which I still do till this day.
I have already work for 3 months. Teach for 3 months.
So fast.
Besides that, d'Gurlz is also proud to say that the bazaar at Subang Parade is quite successful eventhough the sales is not HOT! But all of us really enjoy time spends that weekend. Been a bit busy since back from the bazaar therefore, photos will be uploaded VERY soon! ^.^
oops..
What am I suppose to be ranting about actually? Let me recap.. =.="
OH!
I actually wanted to say that, I have long since become an addicted-blogger because of time. However, I still check out other people blog. It's only my own blog that I'm lazy. Lol...
Anyway, now, right at this moment, I am inspire to write something. (maybe it is due to the boring-ness at office.. since it is the last day before everyone of us flew for CNY holidays, there's really ntg to do.. not that I have things to do normally.. but today time seems to pass REALLY slow..~.~")
So, like I was saying before I sidetrack again.. I am inspire to write a post. Thus I click open blogger and start a new post. Like usual, I click my mouse to the Title bar and intend to name the blog before I write. I stop. I think.
and think
and think
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
and what title did I get?
None..
Nowadays, when I started writing a post, I absolutely have no idea what to write as title. This is because I am not talking about a specific topic. It's more a simple, no logic, no common sense, no law, no creativity, no pix, no links, no events, no nothing post. I just feel like ranting out a piece of my mind so it doesn't get heavier and I get to memorise other things.
Therefore
teach me! What should I put for the title?
This post is already coming to an end but the Title bar is still empty.. ~o~
how?????
I've finally decided.
And you should already know without me repeating. Since that will be the 1st words you would read before reaching here.
Really crap
Really all bullshit!
Alright.. back to staring to computer.. waiting for 6.30pm..ciao!
OH!
I nearly forgot!
HAPPY CHINESE NEW YEAR GALS & GUYS, AUNTIES & UNCLES, POPO & GONGONG, MADAM & SIRS, PUPPIES & KITTIES..!!!!
btw.. speaking of puppies.. I got so sad. My Lucky receive a pink envelope last week.
A CNY card! From See Veterinary!
See?!
My dog got a card! And I don't!!!
How jealous can I get?!
Do I need to act cute like him in order for me to secure a card?
ceh!
Luckily he decided he will share the card with me!
That's why I love him so much!
^.^
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)